Ah, Air Travel…

If you haven’t been listening to the news lately, Scotland Yard recently apprehended several individuals who were plotting to bring explosives onto airplanes on flights departing from Europe. Since this plan “failed”, the good ol’ US Dept. of Homeland Security decided it was time to bring back that wonderful emergency color chart we have known to love. So, our current alert status is yellow. That being the case, passengers are also no longer able to bring certain items into a plane cabin. Certain items… people.

For whatever reason, I seem to be the guru of all news and information to many of my family members and close friends. The rest of you, I commend your ability to pay attention to the news and use the internet for answers. Your skills are extraordinary. No, you just have common sense *insert diabolical laugh*. Anyway, I’ve been continually asked (and argued with) what can and cannot be brought onto a plane. Some think nothing, others believe liquids/gels/anal lubricant and electronic stuff are not allowed.

If you really want to know what the restrictions are, check with your local airport website. That’s right folks, most airports know what the interweb is, and have discovered that people in this day and age often utilize it. I won’t bother to explain what the current restrictions are, so here’s your chance to put your brain to work.
For those of us that reside in Washington State, I have done the needful and provided a link to SeaTac’s updated security restrictions. To the rest of you… take a look at the DHS website.

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~ by zooloo on August 11, 2006.

3 Responses to “Ah, Air Travel…”

  1. My vote is that the security process should allow these aqueous products. The trick is that you must use a significant portion of it before you pass the check. If you are carrying a liquid in a water bottle or other drinking container, you must ingest some of it. If you are carrying a lotion, cream, gel, spray, etc. you must use half of it for it’s intended purpose before you proceed to the gate. I doubt that any explosive/flammable solution will be safe to ingest or spread on one’s skin, hair, eyes, anus, etc. Just have em use it and watch ’em either smell good or have to just use the bathroom, or end up writhing on the floor developing hives.

  2. I dunno, dude. C4 can really even out your skin tone, and nitro glycerine gets rid of crow’s feet, I hear.

  3. Alas, Nick, the real authorities are not as smart as you. They had them pouring everything out into big containers in the middle of the terminal. Brilliant! Surely everyone will be safe then.

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